RiCterMan
ubw luminary


Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Fri Jul 08, 2005 4:06 am |
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Hey All,
I know I said that the break would last a week, but I'm posting three new songs right now, because somehow I've written between 10 to 13 more in the last four days. Basically, I decided to share the three that are the more emotional pieces. After that, I think I'll start the break over again. This one is about my childhood, during a time period that really messed me up, for a long time after. I'd greatly appreciate feedback from you guys, on all three, but I don't mean everyone reply to all three. If you'd prefer to, I don't mind if you only reply to one or two of them. It's up to you. Here's the song...
"Mother Dearest (Burden Song)"
Send the child, to his room.
Tell the child, to get the broom,
to sweep up your floors.
Let the child, hear you wish that he was never born.
(Pre-Chor. #1):
It felt so f*cking good.
(Oh yeah) Let me tell you, (Oh...)
It was lovely.
yeah...
(Chorus):
It stayed
engraved
into the surface of my
brain.
-My greatest ailment.
It placed
Those chains
around my wrists.
Pain
weighed heavy for so long,
and it still haunts me.
Serve the child, only punishments.
Show the child, the explosiveness
of your mental fits.
Help the child
to wish that he was never born.
(Pre-Chor. #2):
It felt so f*cking good.
(to be stabbed) Let me tell you.
Oh, how it felt so lovely.
Oh yeah.
(2nd run Chorus)
(Bridge):
You were greedy, insecure, paranoid.
I was just the innocent little boy
whom you cradled.
You cradled me.
Nothing can ever fill the void.
I was the innocent little boy
whom you cradled,
and ironically...
nearly destroyed.
(3rd run Chorus)
(Outro):
You think flawless.
I think invisible flaws.
You think perfect.
Something in your mind is wrong.
I felt your claws dig
into me.
It stayed
engraved.
It placed
the chains.
It haunts me today.
No.........
EnD
That's it, for that one. Now, to post the second one... Thanks for reading.
Cheers, and a smile, All!
RiCterMan |
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RiCterMan
ubw luminary


Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Mon Jul 11, 2005 5:40 am |
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My style isn't necessarily heavy metal, but it sounds like alternative metal, or something very similar.
Also, (to Ron) This song is another very emotional one, and I'm glad you sensed the intensity that I was trying to send through it's words. Cheers and music!
RiCterMan |
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