RiCterMan
ubw luminary
Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Fri Nov 11, 2005 10:51 am |
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I've been having a little trouble finishing ideas lately, but here I am, with a "success," so to say... It's called, "Storytime", and it's about wanting to share my music with many others. It's kind of a more simplistic effort, but you can look at it, and decide whether or not it has any good quality.
"Storytime"
If you lend me your ears,
I'll tell you a story, with illustrations.
So, go ahead and take your pick,
from the many in my, growing collection.
(Pre-Chor.):
Tales of... the past behind,
and of the present,
and hopes for the future-
all these pages from my mind.
(Chorus):
Stories of life.
-Stories...
Many emotions: happiness, wonder,
and sadness uncovered, opinions, and guidance,
opened wide...,
and open to you.
-All that I've been through,
to be continued.
I'll let you in on these stories,
if you'd like...
If you gather, I'll share
moments of imagery, annunciated.
Enter and take your place on the carpet.
I am ready with my, flowing reflections.
(Pre-Chor.)
(Double Chorus)
(Short Interlude, envisioned)
(Vocals, not worded, for the Bridge)
(Chorus)
-If you'd like.
-If you'd like...
-If you'd like,
the invitation is open...
EnD
What I have in mind for this one, is a slightly mysterious, orchestral sound, with a slower tempo, and quieter vocals. Maybe, in time... I hope some people who may read this, can enjoy it. I write more for the purpose of sending messages to others, who may find agreement with them, than only to express or "get out" the emotions that I use when writing them. Feel pleasant, people.  Later! |
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DamnaNefas
ubw rookie
Joined: Nov 01, 2005
Posts: 67
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| Posted: Sat Nov 12, 2005 6:08 pm |
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Still as lovely as everything else you've written.
Nice work again, Rick!
I especially love the idea of it, but (i'm also not quite sure on the lyric's completion) you should also share maybe your own story(s) in this song. It would grab some more interest, aside from the interest i get from your interesting flow and words.
Well, i actually don't want to promote you changing anything you didn't intend on changing..but the lyrics are good just like this too. (: I'm sort of indecisive on what i intended on saying in the first place. Now i'm just confusing you. sorry. See ya, dude. |
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RiCterMan
ubw luminary
Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Sat Nov 12, 2005 10:31 pm |
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 You aren't confusing me a bit. 
This one is just the way I want it, because I didn't want it to be directly associated with only myself. I kinda' wrote it based on my perceived conception of how all songwriters, and not only songwriters, but also poets, write for the reason of sharing their words with others, aside from writing out their emotions. I hope I made some sense there...
But don't hold back on any suggestions you have. I'm willing to consider any criticisms that I may get when I post my lyrics. The way I see it, the opinions/ideas of another writer can improve what I, or anyone else, on this forum have written. I'll be around. Later! |
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