RiCterMan
ubw luminary
Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Fri Nov 04, 2005 3:47 am |
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I'm gonna' try the "type without somethin' already on paper" thing again, although I do have the general idea for the first two lines in mind already. -Hope you enjoy what this becomes. Oh yeah, by the way, this will be poetry.
"The Indicia Field"
Standing, and staring,
at an open field,
wondering why nothing grows.
Looking above me,
and seeing the clouds.
Then, loudly, the sound of crows.
-Seeds that were planted,
never producing,
even a single stem.
-Wondering if fault lies
within the palm,
of my worn and cracking hand.
Beside distant trees,
are lilies abundant,
surrounded by grass and air.
The scent reaches over
to pass into me,
but I have no reason to care.
I stay in my staring,
and I think, "For what,
is the reason this Earth here is bare?"
Sometimes, there are whispers
from a kind, gentle voice,
that say, "Don't let what bothers bring fear.
In hope, you will find
great ease in your mind,
when you see what emerges, in grace."
-Relaxing; assuring,
until it does fade,
when I soon return back, to the gray.
Crows perched; still around.;
-On the fences they crowd.
They seem to look on, as I quiver.
-Enjoyment. -Is this
the sensation they feel,
while I, from their eyes, can't dissever ?
-So similar to
a degrading review,
or a harsh, driven, insult, that scorns,
but I do not see why
they won't rise back to sky,
as I've done no wrong, to deserve them.
Then, bursting, and burning,
I see lilies exploding!
Crows now depart, with a secret!
I drop to the ground,
onto empty, and now
I learn truth, as I find..., that I'm ceasing...
EnD
That took a little over three hours... I also just came upon an interesting term to use in the title. It's some word I've never seen before, and one definition says it's latin, but the first one doesn't. See, for titles and such, I use answers.com if I'm online, and that's what gave me the two different origins. Anyway, the word I found is 'Indicia', and I am going to give this the title of, "The Indicia Field". I hope some end up liking it. Some parts were extremely frustrating for me to come up with. If there's any kind of errors in this, please let me know. I've gotta' post this though, and maybe get offline. Later! |
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RiCterMan
ubw luminary
Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Sat Nov 05, 2005 12:09 am |
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Thanks, guys!
Erick: The lines you quoted from this are supposed to signal the twist of it. It sounds all comforting and soothing and shit, but basically that voice is telling him once you're dead ease will arise. See, I've always loved Edgar Allen Poe's writing, and I guess his morbid style rubbed off a little. This is the first one I've written that has an eerie hidden meaning, but it just evolved into that. I'm glad you guys found it to be interesting. Later! |
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