  |
Message |
Bannabein
ubw newbie
Joined: May 14, 2005
Location: Sweden
Posts: 23
|
| Posted: Fri Sep 23, 2005 5:22 pm |
 |
| seVven wrote: |
Ok ..... the big question ...... has anybody LIT one .... ??  |
No, I'm affraid to do that.
But I'm considering farting in a bottle to see if it still would smell if I opened it a week later. |
|
|
| Back to top |
 |
|
dagon
ubw rookie
Joined: Feb 12, 2005
Location: glenrothes, UK.
Posts: 199
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 5:31 am |
|
Thats quite outrageous!
I thought she was gonna light one, but its probably better that she didnt as the room would have gone up.
I once read a story in a Scotish newspaper (The Sunday Post) about a guy who farted so much one night in bed that he actually killed himself through suffocation as there was so much methane in the room.
 |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Guitarman152
ubw luminary
Joined: Aug 03, 2005
Location: Hamden, Ct. . . .USA
Posts: 719
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 7:02 am |
|
hehehehe lol !!! . . . .  . . now we 're going on this forum .
I love it all! . . .I though she was gonna lite it too, but that last one she did was quite musical . . .decible = 6 , stink = you had to be there,
relief = that'd be up to her, melody = 5, duration 3+ seconds.
thanx people, . . . .lets keep this going .  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Guitarman152
ubw luminary
Joined: Aug 03, 2005
Location: Hamden, Ct. . . .USA
Posts: 719
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 12:41 pm |
|
i sure hope no one get offended by this forum, as we could all use some humor in our lives and there is nothing like fart humor bcause we all do it and have found ourselves in some embarressing situation where a funny story will come about . . . so please take it in the good natured way it is meant . . . thanx . . .  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
seVven
ubw active poster
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Location: Neutral Zone
Posts: 271
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 3:02 pm |
|
  
"Oh!! I've got sooooo much Gas" ..... in a Marylin Monroe voice ...  ... Absolute Quality.
That last one put me in mind of Guitarmans 'Gurgler'
... and a ...  on the 'No Offence' from me too.
Fart Humour is as old as ... erm ... Farts themselves??
Soooo .... Dagon .... Bannabein ...... where are your Farts Pleeeeze??
Don't be shy.
Surely there can't just be two people on this forum who Fart??
Okaay .... I've had an Indian Curry this evening ..... will report in tomorrow.  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
dagon
ubw rookie
Joined: Feb 12, 2005
Location: glenrothes, UK.
Posts: 199
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 3:09 pm |
|
I dont fart. I never fart. In fact, I dont even know what farting is!
By the way, I heard that the guy who played Darth Vader farted in his suit when he was filming the final fight in Return of the Jedi. Thats not makeup hes wearing when the helmet comes off!.
And Just to digress a little, does anyone know if Transformers fart? This little guy down here seems to be trying to squeeze something out!
 |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Bssgrl
ubw fanatic
Joined: Aug 06, 2005
Location: Hamden, CT
Posts: 431
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 3:25 pm |
|
| dagon wrote: | | I dont fart. I never fart. In fact, I dont even know what farting is! |
Ok Dagon, here's a definition for you from Webster's Dictionary to help you out
fart ( P ) Pronunciation Key (färt) Vulgar Slang
intr.
v. fart·ed, fart·ing, farts
To expel intestinal gas through the anus; break wind.
n.
An often audible discharge of intestinal gas.
If you want some more "Farting Fun" on the web check out
Fart.com
Now come on, break some wind for us LOL!!!! |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
seVven
ubw active poster
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Location: Neutral Zone
Posts: 271
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 4:27 pm |
|
 Think it was Oxford Concise ... described it as a "Slight Explosion between the Hips" 
@ Bssgrl .... If Fart is ... 'Vulgar Slang' .... What is the proper word for it ..??? I've never known them as anything else.
I don't know Dagon ... for a guy who does'nt fart or know what a fart is ... you sure know a hell of a lot about them ... are you sure ...you have'nt done one .... ?? ....  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Bannabein
ubw newbie
Joined: May 14, 2005
Location: Sweden
Posts: 23
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 5:19 pm |
|
| seVven wrote: | Soooo .... Dagon .... Bannabein ...... where are your Farts Pleeeeze??
Don't be shy.
|
Ok, I won't.
12.47AM:
Squatting to sit down on an empty plastic suitcase (good resonance) while talking to my girlfriend on the phone.
Decibel: 5
Stink: 7 (had a couple of beers)
Relief/Satisfaction: 7 (took away my stomach ache)
Melody: 4 (+ for keeping the same clean, high pitched tone, - for lack of variation)
Duration: 5 (allthough I didn't have that much gas, the flow was real steady and nice) |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Bannabein
ubw newbie
Joined: May 14, 2005
Location: Sweden
Posts: 23
|
| Posted: Sun Sep 25, 2005 7:06 pm |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
dagon
ubw rookie
Joined: Feb 12, 2005
Location: glenrothes, UK.
Posts: 199
|
| Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 11:31 am |
|
i dont think it was a case of posting video clips not being allowed.
links to clips are ok, but someone was spamming the same clips in the forums, across different forums.
 |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
seVven
ubw active poster
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Location: Neutral Zone
Posts: 271
|
| Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 1:21 pm |
|
 I'm worried about Guitarman.
I think he may have gone for the big one ..
Lets hope he is back soon ... with a Strum of those Happy Chords ... and a couple of 10's ....... 
Bannabein .... sounded like a good one ... medicinal too. The amplifier was a cool stroke ... the girlfriend must have been glad she was on the other end of the phone ... |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Guitarman152
ubw luminary
Joined: Aug 03, 2005
Location: Hamden, Ct. . . .USA
Posts: 719
|
| Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 2:47 pm |
|
don't worry man , I'm here . . I just havn't been gassy lately . .
although . . .a few days ago after having marinated roasted red peppers with feta cheese I had a very interesting evening and proceeded to bombard my girlfriend all night long. . . 
decible = 0.5 (sbd's)
stink level = 8.7's +++
durations = 2,3,2,3,2,3,2,3,3,3,4,2,1,2, etc . . . .
melody = 0
satisfaction = ?? . . at least she still loves me . . . . 
her reaction = 
and no way would I . . . . .but I would . .  and then .  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
seVven
ubw active poster
Joined: Feb 03, 2005
Location: Neutral Zone
Posts: 271
|
| Posted: Mon Sep 26, 2005 3:30 pm |
|
 .. Wheyyyy ... he's back.
Peppers and fetta.?? .... add a glass of Retsina to that and we'll party.
I was in Corfu in May .... could'nt eat enough of the stuff.
Which brings me to my day.
The tables were turned on me. 
11:45am GMT
Marks and Spencer - frozen food counter (six people - close proximity)
All of a sudden .. I got this ghastly whiff ... something like your cousins green fog.
A fellow farter had obvioously decided to drop a sneaky silent one.
Duration: guessing 4 ( 1-1-1-1 the whole way down the aisle)
Decibel: 0 ... a secret silent one
Stink: 6 .. verging on a 7 - I had to run .... nearly made me 
Melody: 0
Satisfaction: 10+ .... I'm guessing they were pretty pleased with themselves.
strange thing was ..... we all looked at each other ... with that accusing look 
I'm convinced that the culprit was a rather attractive blonde haired girl (the only female there) and she was ... punishing the guys for staring at her .... (frozen food ?? .... cold???? ... got it?)
Wow ..... you're girlfriend put up with all that ... that is Lurrrve....  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
Guitarman152
ubw luminary
Joined: Aug 03, 2005
Location: Hamden, Ct. . . .USA
Posts: 719
|
| Posted: Tue Sep 27, 2005 7:31 am |
|
| seVven wrote: |
strange thing was ..... we all looked at each other ... with that accusing look
I'm convinced that the culprit was a rather attractive blonde haired girl (the only female there) and she was ... punishing the guys for staring at her .... (frozen food ?? .... cold???? ... got it?)
Wow ..... you're girlfriend put up with all that ... that is Lurrrve.... |
LMAO !! . . . .got it !!
yeah my girl is the best!! . . .  |
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
|