RiCterMan
ubw luminary
Joined: Jun 10, 2005
Location: Madison, OH
Posts: 742
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| Posted: Mon Jul 25, 2005 4:08 am |
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Nice job! The strong emotions are very evident in this. One thing I would say as constructive criticism, pertains to the two parts that start with, "It seems no one here understands me", and lead into the line, "because you are not me." The wordings could be seen as too repetitive. It says "me" at the end of the first two lines, "easy" at the end of the third, and "me" again, at the end of the last two. If it sounds good when you sing it, then just disregard what I'm saying, because I'm just reading it, for now. However, if it was unintentional, you might wanna' think about changing it. Your song...; your choice, and this is only meant to be helpful criticism. Cheers, you!
RiCterMan
RiCterMan |
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